2006-09-04

如何度过装修难关



据说装修有三大定律:钱基本花光、人基本累死、夫妻感情基本破裂。如果有切身体会的Psytopic网友,请帮我们验证这个定律。今天的主题不是装修知识技巧的传播,而是从婚姻心理学的角度,给正准备装修的朋友一些建议。装修期间,你会发现自己陷入了一片混乱,收藏这个页面,在你需要的时候打开。-psytopic.com

你俩正准备重新装修居室吗?请三思而后行。

1 夫妻俩事先没能分享对新家的期望,装修很可能会变成一场灾难;

2 你所花的钱总会比计划的多;

3 实际花的时间总会比预想的长;

4 从地砖的颜色到吊灯的式样,两个人在每件事上都会意见不一;

5 装修期间,你会发现自己陷入了一片混乱;

6 装修的结果往往也不合心意;

7 在小事上的分歧却会给婚姻留下阴影。

装修要求两人共同商量如何用钱、分享对家的期望与梦想、共同处理麻烦。

给苦于装修的夫妇的即时贴士

1 两人关系中若尚有问题没有解决不宜急于装修。

2 对房子的期望应从实际出发。

3 作好准备,你的正常的生活会被噪声、混乱、灰尘及装修带来的其他不便所打乱。

4 留出一间整洁、安静的房间,供生活之需。

5 与爱人一同探讨对新家的期望。

6 讨论如何平衡两人不同的观点与品味作出最后的决定;

7 在选购建材前做好充分的市场调查、制订细致的计划,然后再开始采购;

8 现实面对做得到的与做不到的。

9 准备好面对分歧与争执,同时准备好作出妥协。

10 别把装潢变成夫妻间的战争,你们其实是在为家庭中的权威争吵

11 想好如果超预算了怎么办;

12交流、交流、最重要的还是交流。


感谢Psytopic成员Jeremy翻译。

附原文:

How to Keep your Marriage Together During a Remodeling Project

Are the two of you considering remodeling a room in your home? Think twice.

The remodeling experience of many couples could be a horrible one if they don't share their expectations with each other.

* You may spend more money than you planned.
* Your remodeling project may take longer than you thought it would.
* You may find yourselves disagreeing on everything from the color of the floor tiles to the style of ceiling lighting to purchase.
* You may find yourselves living in chaos during the remodeling.
* You could end up not being happy with the results of the remodel job.
* Small or petty disagreements loom larger in your marriage relationship.

A remodeling project requires that the two of you are able to talk about money, hopes, dreams, expectations and dealing with mistakes.

Handy Hints for the Handy Couple

* If your relationship has communication problems or other unresolved issues, don't start a remodeling project.

* Have realistic expectations.

* Prepare yourselves for disruption of your daily routine by the noise, clutter, dirt and inconvenience of the project.

* Keep part of your house untouched, clean, and quiet.

* Talk about your expectations.

* Discuss how you will make decisions that involve different tastes and viewpoints.

* Do your homework, research, shop, and have concrete plans before you spend any money.

* Develop a budget. Discuss what your options are if your remodel project appears to be costing more than you planned.

* Be honest with one another about what you can handle and what you will or won't do on the project. For instanc, if one of you absolutely will not go up on the roof, that needs to be shared.

* Accept that conflict will happen. Be open to compromise.

* Don't let the project turn into a battleground that is really about other issues like power and control.

* Communicate, communicate, and communicate.

Author: Sheri & Bob Stritof
Translation: psytopic.com (Jeremy)

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