有一次，女友突然问我，你最喜欢做的事情是什么？我想了一想，说是滑冰。滑冰时的感觉太好了，清新而冰凉的空气，四周美好的景色...那你上次滑冰什么时候呢？女友又问。好像，是三年前？我答到。然后女友问了我一个当时难以回答的问题：这么说，三年来都做没做过自己最喜欢的事情，你生活得是不是不太wisely？-psytopic.com
以上对话来自Eric，他随后讨论到：阻止我们经常去做自己喜欢的事情，可能是因为这些事情背后都需经历一些不大令人愉快的体验，比如组织一场滑雪旅行就够人受的。他提出一个观点：我喜欢滑雪，但我真正喜欢的是，在天气晴朗雪地适宜，同时人又不多的情况下享受急速滑行。我不喜欢在缆车前排长龙，有时滑到半天我就精疲力竭已经谈不上享受了。因此我挺赞同Eric——虽然滑雪是让人享受的，但另一方面它也有令人不快的地方。不过，Eric和你也许会对另外一种观点感兴趣：
在《满意》一书中，Gregory Berns提到：再好的事情做多了也会腻。比如，寿司是某人最爱吃的食品，如果让他每天都吃，那么它或许就没那么美味了。其中部分原因是我们的欲望是多变的。我们除了避免重复做喜爱的事情带来的乏味，同时也因为我们渴望变化。我喜欢滑雪，但我也喜欢美味的食物、电影和到美术馆溜达。我更愿意把生命分别花在这些事情上，而不是把所有时间都用来滑雪。
Berns提到的另一个观点是：痛苦和快乐的界线并没有你想象的那么明显。从马拉松热衷者到辛辣食物偏好者，很多人都喜欢去做一些实际上是带来痛苦的事情。也许，我们不去做自己喜欢的事情，恰恰是提高了这些事情的快乐程度。
阅读原文：
Why don't we do our favorite things all the time?
Eric Schwitzgebel offers an interesting paradox:
When I was a graduate student, a girlfriend asked me what, of all things, I most enjoyed doing. Eschewing the obvious and half-clever reply, I answered skiing -- thinking of those moments of breathing the cold, clean air, taking in the mountain view, then expertly carving a steep, lonely slope. But how long had it been since I'd gone skiing -- maybe three years? My girlfriend suggested that if has been three years since I've done what I most enjoyed doing, then maybe I wasn't living wisely.
Schwitzgebel argues that the negatives of these experiences (organizing a ski trip can be a pain) may be what prevents us from doing them more often, and he's got a point: I love skiing, but what I love is having a great run, when the snow is good, the weather is nice, and the slopes aren't too crowded. I don't like long lift lines, and after skiing half a day, I'm sometimes too exhausted to enjoy myself. So I tend to agree with him -- certain aspects of skiing can be the most enjoyable, but other aspects are quite unenjoyable. But Schwitzgebel (and CogDaily readers) might be interested in another viewpoint on the matter:
In the book Satisfaction, Gregory Berns argues that too much of a good thing can make it less good. For example, sushi is his favorite food, but if he ate it every day, it wouldn't seem as good. Part of what we crave is variety. So it's not just avoidance of displeasure that keeps us from doing our favorite thing all the time, it's also our craving for variety. I enjoy skiing, but I also enjoy great food, movies, and art museums almost as much. I'd rather spend my life doing some of each of these things, rather than just skiing all the time.
Another point that Berns makes is that the line between pain and pleasure is less distinct than you may think. From ultramarathoners to lovers of spicy food, many people like to do things which are actually painful. Perhaps our avoidance of the things we love actually enhances their pleasure.
As you can see from the Amazon reviews, Berns' book may be a bit self-indulgent at times (perhaps this is appropriate for a book about satisfaction), but it can also be elucidating. The book is probably half-science, half-memoir, but it's mostly interesting, and can offer some new perspectives on issues like the ones Schwitzgebel brings up.
感谢油茶研究会提供素材/原文链接
本文由Psytopic成员lightor翻译
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